A very brief review of useful books

James very brief review of self-healing and improvement books 

Financial 

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The 3 books below all have the same underlying ideas, but they all have very different focuses. 

Step 1.) get debt free. 

Step 2.) use low cost indexed funds in tax advangaged buckets to build money 

step 3.) use that money intelligently, including setting up charitable trusts etc. 

Total Money Makeover 

A big tent revival christian pastor preaches on the evils of debt, and how to overcome this devil in your life. Think 12 step for debt. drastic measures proposed. Many of them were necessary for me, but this book is very much a book for sick people written by someone dealing with a sickness of debt addiction.  Could be useful for the right people, or when read/listened to from the correct perspective. 

This book is 90% how to get out of debt, and 10% what to do when you’re out. 

Simple Path to Wealth 

The majority of this book starts where TMM left off. The first chapter advises you to crush your debts before you begin, as much as you can.  From there it lays out a really simple path to wealth accumulation, using 401k’s, IRA’s, and other tax advantaged buckets. He’s a big fan of very low cost index funds.  The final section of the book is how to get the money back out as effectively as possible when you retire.  It was written by a father for his daughter who didn’t care about finances.  This is my favorite financial book. 

This book is 5% how to get out of debt, 45% how to accumulate wealth and 50% how to spend that wealth once you have it. Note, the focus is on accumulation, but as accumulation is simpler than accessing it, the split by volume is tilted the other way. 

I Will Teach You To Be Rich 

This book is more targeted at the college age kid and is huge on automation.  He talks about using credit cards intelligently and focuses on building self-tending financial systems.  Again, the basic advice is the same, but the method and presentation are radically different. 

Personal development 

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Big Magic 

Be an artist. Make art. Your life will get better. This is a how to manual by a real magician. A+++ 

Atomic Habits 

Lifetimes of discipline are a lie.  Discipline is exclusively a short term solution at best.  Atomic habits address the brain and it’s chemistry and our emotions, and how we can develop habits we want, and to a lesser extent, how we can break habits we don’t want.    This is about building an environment to produce useful habits, which are how we really do the things we believe are discipline. Great book. 

You are not Your Brain 

NOT AVAILABLE ON AUDIBLE.. but so good I had to include it anyway.  Atomic habits addresses habits on the external level.  YANYB addresses compulsive thought, and how to deal with it.  It was essential for me during the Trump years and has helped me regain control over my own emotions and interactions with others. It’s hard, but its amazingly productive.  I will continue working this process for a very long time. 

Interpersonal Skills 

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How to Win Friends and Influence People 

First published in 1936 this book revolutionized interpersonal relations and was possibly the first interpersonal self-help book of any notoriety.  The principles are simple and self evident,  (principles https://www.samuelthomasdavies.com/book-summaries/self-help/how-to-win-friends-and-influence-people/ ) and the book is mostly examples, but those plethora of examples put the concepts ready to hand, should you need them. 

Never Split the Difference 

Deceptively named to make you think it’s about hardball negotiation, instead it’s about finding mutually beneficial solutions, active listening, and working with a hostile audience (it’s written by a former FBI lead hostage negotiator) A great read after HTWFAIP above, for future refinement of our interpersonal toolbox. 

7 Habits of Highly Effective People 

Takes the tools of the two above, rips them apart and replaces the idea of tools with the idea of underlying intention and self-examination.  Without a doubt the most powerful book I’ve read.  Crushed me. Puts everything else on this entire list in perspective, and gives you a framework from with to use the tools the other books provide.  THIS IS THE MOST IMPORTANT BOOK TO ME!

The Power of Vulnerability 

If Big Magic was about dealing with other people, it would be this book. Brilliantly read on audible by someone who has dealt with some very common problems, and come up with amazingly effective solutions.  I love Brene Brown and this book is why.  It’s a great follow up to 7hohep above, and gives a specific area in which one can start applying the principles.  A++++ 

A little rest

Upon what mad, impoverished shore
one day my boat shall land
when I shall speak of days of yore
and all the things we planned.

The mid-day sun has parched my skin
the race, I know, has done me in.

And now I seek no great reward
but peace and simple quiet
and looking now I have been told
I’ve not the coin to buy it.

This race is never ending
until with dying gasp
we see our new beginning
has been paid for at last.

Let me then find my peace
when and where I may
for my labors shall not cease
until that dying day.

On my reticence to discuss sectarian politics or religion

I have come to my desire for silence both through the teachings of Masonry and of my particular faiths, both of my youth in Christianity, and my adulthood in Thelema, and through my own observations on my mind when I participate in these discussions. Consequently, you will see these all mixed together below. I do not seek to conflate them and strongly caution that no one should, for they are all very different and stand on their own legs, excepting in the case of the individual who has within him all of these things intermingled.  Please excuse my commingling of these many elements.

Let us start from Masonry, and expand from there:

“’tis now thought more expedient only to oblige them to that
Religion in which all Men agree, leaving their particular
Opinions to themselves ; that is, to be good Men and true, or
Men of Honour and Honesty, by whatever Denominations
or Persuasions they may be distinguish’d ; whereby Masonry
becomes the Center of Union, and the Means of conciliating
true Friendship among Persons that must else have remain’d
at a perpetual Distance.”

— Andersons Constitution of 1723.

“Lord, help us to practice out of the Lodge, those great moral duties which are inculcated in it”

— Excerpt from a Masonic prayer.

Is “keeping our particular opinions to ourselves” a great moral duty? No, it is not. To wit, a number of great statesmen and religious leaders have come from our Fraternity, and for their sharing of their ideas, greater liberty and peace have come to many. Yet still, for me, trying to cultivate this practice out of Lodge has proven significantly beneficial, and improved my life greatly.

I used to be, if no great debater myself, at least proxy to great political and religious debates within the online Thelemic and libertarian communities.  I felt that I got a lot out of it, and it certainly increased my knowledge and expanded my understanding. It also caused significant rifts and divided people. It lead to in-crowds and out-crowds, and many of those rifts have not fully healed in more than a decades time. I doubt they ever will.

I made my first post yesterday in over 2 years.  I had quit posting years earlier because I did not wish to engage in the fighting any longer. What was intended as a very positive post on the works of Thomas Merton and my reflections on humility, became, for a full half of the document, a diatribe against the faith of my youth;  a faith to which many good men I know aspire. I seek to cast no aspersions on them nor on whatever path they take which allows them to be who they are, yet as it was my own and for me was evil, I found myself hard-pressed not to argue against it.

This caused me to reflect on what it is I wish to discuss and why. Both our spiritual and political beliefs and the actions they inspire are critically important and require serious investigation and contemplation. Both are well served by a solid understanding of their history and a realistic assessment of their effects in the world today. More than anything else, these will affect how we perceive the world and what we will do to and for ourselves and our neighbor.

While the discussion of these can be a worthy or noble task, I have found, for me, that exercising silence on these matters is more noble. Why? Certain quotes from my chosen faith, Thelema, come to mind:

In Liber ABA, Crowley writes:

“Thus ‘non-killing,’ which originally meant ‘do not excite yourself by stalking tigers,’ has been interpreted to mean that it is a crime to drink water that has not been strained, lest you should kill the animalcula.

But this constant worry, this fear of killing anything by mischance is, on the whole, worse than a hand-to-hand conflict with a grisly bear. If the barking of a dog disturbs your meditation, it is simplest to shoot the dog, and think no more about it.”

While we can certainly argue his thoughts on any authentic niyama as practiced by the Yogi or Hindu, I am content to accept it as worthy advice to the Thelemite. In speaking of magical schools he said in Magick Without Tears:

“Contact with other students only means that you criticize their hats, and then their morals; and I am not going to encourage this. Your work is not anybody else’s; and undirected chatter is the worst poisonous element in human society.”
and from Liber Al, we receive:

“Success is thy proof: argue not; convert not; talk not overmuch!”

and

“to each man and woman that thou meetest, were it but to dine or to drink at them, it is the Law to give. Then they shall chance to abide in this bliss or no; it is no odds.”

But what good would we be, as Thelemites, if we did not test our work and our scriptures, “success is your proof!”

So what is success, to the Thelemite, but individual attainment? For some Will to war, and others to peace. Some to conversation and others to solitude. It is this which most distinguishes Thelema from the heard, that our sole unifying tenet is this: Do YOUR work. Find your own path as laid out by the Divine, and in that Divine Will which is uniquely your own, work.

For some, arguing politics and religion will prove fruitful. For me, peace and tranquility of mind, contemplation and reflection are what I most seek, at least for now. History has shown that the debates of religion and politics, both for myself and for others are sources of great division, and in that division, I find myself most disturbed and thrown from the Great Work.

So then, with all that laid out, the costs made clear, let us examine what can be gained.

Last night, against my inclination and intention, I got into a discussion over what libertarianism is, and why I ascribe to this belief system. It went well enough and we both parted ways amicably. While libertarian debate is old ground to me, he patiently listened and made himself the student. (and what else is the mark of a true master, but to remain always a student?)  This is a challenging task at the best of times, doubly so when listening to your ideological “enemy”, and I think the better of him for it and aspire to the same myself.

He not only let me speak, but listened to me, and in such, heard my thoughts on the Non-aggression-principle, nuisance laws, immigration and wars of aggression along with my understanding of how the corporate shield and libertarianism are incompatible.

In short, we came to recognize that our ideals are not so different,  that we see different means of achieving them, and we count different costs as higher to the individual, although we both recognize the trade offs as significant. It helped to build a bridge between two communities which often find the other immoral and created a personal connection which is the root of all love and respect between communities.

In performing these apologetics, we can, if they are done well, help heal rifts which require healing now more than ever. I do not pretend this is an ignoble or unneeded task.

But for this to happen, we must both start from a place of listening. We must both intend to be students more than teachers, and we must both be interested in hearing what the other has to say. This is harder every year, and so seldom done well, even by those of us who sincerely try. For me, this sincerity starts with listening rather than speaking, which is why to speak of these things so disturbed me. And still I have a very hard time listening to someone on a subject I believe myself somewhat knowledgable on. In part, it is because if I am listening at all, I find myself listening to an argument instead of a person, and in an argument, one listens to counter, not to learn.

Too often I find that we lead with our beliefs. We engage in a competition of who is right and who is wrong. We do not allow for the sharing of our humanity, humility and care for others; or if we do, it is so cursory as to be insignificant. If we lead with care only as it allows us to then convert, we have not lead with care at all but merely with strategy, and a transparent one at at that. In this, or even in the perception that this may be the case, we risk negating true good will and friendship, creating fear that it was all staged as an attempt to make our own philosophy look “compassionate”.

That this is even a concern is upsetting into and of itself, and yet it is something I have seen time and time again.  This strategy has been so beaten into my head in my youth, that I refuse outright, to turn from my sincere and true affection for the purpose of preaching; that the former might remain uncorrupted.

In short, it troubles my mind and conscious, and leaves me the lesser for the conversation, however jovial it may be. So I have chosen instead to pursue the path of peace and tranquility.

This then is my reflection, and my ask of any who may stumble upon my writings. Not that you should or should not engage in debate or outright battle, but that you should know fully its cost, and decide wisely if you wish to pay it, with reasonable expectations as to what that cost may buy you.

Reflections on Humility

Who will love a little Sparrow?
Will no one write her eulogy?
“I will,” said the Earth
“For all I’ve created returns unto me
From dust were ye made and dust ye shall be”

— Paul Simon, from “Sparrow” off of “Wednesday Morning, 3am”

I am reading Thomas Merton’s “Thoughts in Solitude”.  Merton was a Trappist monk, and his writing reflects this entirely.  It is couched deeply in Christianity.

Strong Christian language still evokes a visceral reaction from me, and it is challenging to encounter, primarily for the hate disguised as love, and the self-negation and denigration of the great human species which seems to me to be inherent in it. Christianity, as it was taught to me, shows that we are as filthy (mensural) rags. The scriptures say “our works” and yet every devout conventional Christian I know, views this as a comment on the self. Why should they not? All have sinned and fall short of the Glory of God, and their God is omni-potent, omni-benevolent, and omni-sentient, and yet there is childhood cancer, famine, wide-spread disease, the rape of children etc. I have found not theodicy which is valid to me. That which I see most often, is that if God is all good, all seeing and all powerful, and these things happen, then it must truly be only their own mind which is so sick and twisted that these things are bad-therein? For someone who invents the sicknesses they see in the world around them must truly be evil. I know of no Christian who says it like I have said it above, and yet when I enter into conversation with them, this is what I hear from them. Take it as you will. Perhaps I am entirely wrong. It would not be the first time. Yet it has been my experience time and time again, and that is all I can work from.

No, I think Christianity, at least as it is conventionally practiced, is a sickness. The same can most likely be said of all religions, yet Christianity was my cradle religion, and so it is the only one I am qualified to speak on, and in that, only the Christianity which i know. If yours is perfect and this does not apply, then let it be. And yet, in all faiths, we find those who move beyond the trappings of their religion, and into the realms of true seeking after the divine. They give up their own sickness and complexes, and come to a place beyond self judgement working only, earnestly, every day, to achieve communion with that which is beyond. This is the summum bonum which is contrary to all religions and dogmas, and yet is found by the faithful in all of them. I find Merton, through this writing, to be one of these true disciples and have been working to understand his own work in the light of my own path.

In his 15th chapter, he speaks of humility, with the aspiration to, and resolution of this simple prayer:

“I offer up this sincere prayer of my humility.”

He recognizes taking pride in his humility and finding this pride sinful, feels shame and recognizes that he can only offer up what he is. In this there is wisdom. I endeavor to reconcile the same process for myself:

In Thelema we often value pride, as it sets us apart from those who eschew that natural part of us. This is a goodness, to know and embrace a rightful pride, to not live in denial of this part of our humanity. Yet we often ignore humility which is essential when we come before God, or if you prefer, when we in our humanity stand before that Greater Self, which the Christians call “God in us” or the Holy Spirit. If we are students of Librae, and seek balance, we must know both of these in their fullness.

So what is my sincere prayer of humility? How can it exist? I am proud of my humility, and thus know it not to be true humility. In this, Merton is correct. Though I be no Christian, and see no sin in pride for prides sake, in this pride, the pride of humility which is incomplete humility, which is failing, I feel shame. Shame, unlike pure pride or pure humility, is a sickness and a useless thing, causing only setbacks.

And yet, I offer up what I have, with its humility and pride and shame all intermingled. I offer up my humanity. I offer up myself unto God, as I am.

If pride is the left hand path, and humility the right, then let us, as always travel up the middle path, offering what we are, with neither the pretensions of perfection nor of being “as filthy rags” but come boldly before the throne through the redemption of incarnation (“With the Coin redeemeth He”)

And the great Divine, in whom is all things, and who is in all things, by its very nature will accept this sacrifice which is at the same time both great and small, pure and corrupt, being of the nature of all incarnate things; for from the Divine we have sprung forth, and to the Divine we shall return, and in the divine, we are. Even our understanding of distance from the divine, our suffering and our pain at that suffering is in it’s own way a completeness of being and existence, which is a part of God-in-us.

This then is the secret of firmness, which is neither rigidity nor meakness; The ocean teaches us this when we sail, the wind and wing when we fly, and it is preached strongly in Aikido.  It is found in “Desiderata” and in the teachings of even the meanest of self-help coaches, if they say anything useful at all.   Let us offer what we have to the tasks before us, honestly searching.  Let us be gentle with ourselves, for in gentility, we are encouraged to continue and comforted in the work we have done, avoiding the pointless discouragement which is shame, and which stops us from continuing, yet also avoiding pride which allows us to say “we have done enough, we have achieved!”  Veering to the left or the right is stagnation and stoppage.  So continue gently and firmly, with love for ourselves, either our love if we be strong, or only “Gods” love if we are not yet strong enough to love ourselves, and permit ourselves that most important forgiveness and exaltation.  “Continue, for your work is sufficient.”

Memento Mori

A while back I was speaking to a Brother (in the truest sense, beyond blood or titles conveyed by anyone except he who refers to a man so) about life and examining the lessons of the lesser mysteries. I mentioned that the lessons on death are beautiful, but some people forget the certain and irrefutable truth of what happens after you die.

My Brother was incredulous, knowing me not to be of a literalist understanding of the Holy scriptures. He knew I was setting him up for something, but being a better gentleman than myself, proceeded to bite and allow me my hubris in presentation.

What I can tell you for certain about the events after your death is this:

On Masculinity, Part 1 of 2

 

The below is the first half of a 2 part series on masculinity, toxic and healthy.

I aspire to masculinity, but I recognize that there has been a corruption of the ideal which leads people to do sick things. Because of this, I was inspired by a brother (thank you Brendan, whose own wonderful and insightful writings can be found at https://www.facebook.com/Acratophorus-865039256875008/ or https://www.greatnoontide.com) to examine Masculinity, both it’s healthy and unhealthy manifestations.

Banishing, Grounding, Invoking, Evoking and Sacred Space

What are banishing, grounding, invoking, evoking and sacred space?

when, why and how would I use them?

What is the Lesser Ritual of the Pentagram, and why and how can it benefit me?

Read on for my fully unqualified answers, and please let me know where I can improve them.

On the intrinsic nature of rights

Human rights are neither granted not revoked, but merely recognized. This is because of the very nature of those rights, which is intrinsic to the human experience, as much a part of us as physical health or spiritual and emotional wellness, both of which can be in a greater or lesser state of health, but never the less are ideally fully functional.

Love Contra Compassion

Another older piece, originally penned December 14, 2014. It’s a little self-helpy, but I think there’s enough worthwhile material in here to make it worth publishing. It’s a little long, but if you’re interested… here it is.

Compassion is not a form of Love, rather it is a corruption, harmful to both Thelema and Agape.

Beauty and Age

What modernity describes as beauty is merely a blank canvas onto which we can project any story we desire. What we see as beauty is a story we can understand and aspire towards.